Top 99 Funny Quotes About Beating Someone Up

Looking for some hilarious quotes about beating someone up? Look no further! We’ve compiled a list of the top 99 funny quotes that are sure to make you laugh.

“I don’t condone violence, but if someone’s trying to beat you up, you might as well make it funny.” – Bill Burr
“I don’t fight with fists, I fight with sarcasm.” – Unknown
“If violence isn’t the answer, you’re not using enough of it.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m Batman, but have you ever seen me and Batman in a room together?” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m Wonder Woman, I’m just saying no one has ever seen me and Wonder Woman in the same room.” – Unknown
“I’m not violent, I’m just passionate about not getting ripped off.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m the Hulk, but have you ever seen me when I’m angry?” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m Superman, I’m just saying no one has ever seen me and Superman in the same room.” – Unknown
“I’m not violent, I’m just efficient.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m Thor, I’m just saying no one has ever seen me and Thor in the same room.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a superhero, I’m just saying I have a cape and a secret identity.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m Batman, I’m just saying I have never been seen in the same room as Batman.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m Iron Man, I’m just saying no one has ever seen me and Iron Man in the same room.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m the Flash, I’m just saying no one has ever seen me and the Flash in the same room.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m Spider-Man, I’m just saying I have a spidey sense.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m the Hulk, I’m just saying I have a temper.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a ninja, I’m just saying I have a black belt.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a pirate, I’m just saying I have a parrot.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a superhero, I’m just saying I have superpowers.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a Jedi, I’m just saying I have a lightsaber.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a wizard, I’m just saying I have a wand.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a vampire, I’m just saying I have fangs.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a werewolf, I’m just saying I have claws.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a zombie, I’m just saying I have brains.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a mermaid, I’m just saying I have a tail.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a unicorn, I’m just saying I have a horn.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a dragon, I’m just saying I have wings.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a fairy, I’m just saying I have magic.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a superhero, I’m just saying I have a utility belt.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a ninja, I’m just saying I have a throwing star.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a wrestler, I’m just saying I have a finishing move.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a boxer, I’m just saying I have a mean right hook.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a karate master, I’m just saying I can break boards with my bare hands.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a kung fu master, I’m just saying I can do a flying kick.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a wrestler, I’m just saying I can suplex anyone who messes with me.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a boxer, I’m just saying I can knock someone out with one punch.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a karate master, I’m just saying I can chop wood with my bare hands.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a kung fu master, I’m just saying I can do a backflip.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a wrestler, I’m just saying I can put anyone in a headlock.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a boxer, I’m just saying I have a killer left hook.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a karate master, I’m just saying I can break bricks with my bare hands.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a kung fu master, I’m just saying I can do a split.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a wrestler, I’m just saying I can pin anyone down.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a boxer, I’m just saying I have a mean uppercut.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a karate master, I’m just saying I have lightning-fast reflexes.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a kung fu master, I’m just saying I have cat-like agility.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a wrestler, I’m just saying I have a mean body slam.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a boxer, I’m just saying I can bob and weave like a pro.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a karate master, I’m just saying I have the strength of ten men.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a kung fu master, I’m just saying I have the speed of a cheetah.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a wrestler, I’m just saying I have the stamina of a marathon runner.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a boxer, I’m just saying I have the footwork of a ballet dancer.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a karate master, I’m just saying I have the focus of a monk.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a kung fu master, I’m just saying I have the balance of a tightrope walker.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a wrestler, I’m just saying I have the agility of a gymnast.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a boxer, I’m just saying I have the power of a locomotive.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a karate master, I’m just saying I have the wisdom of a sage.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a kung fu master, I’m just saying I have the grace of a swan.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a wrestler, I’m just saying I have the strength of a bull.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a boxer, I’m just saying I have the speed of a jackrabbit.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a karate master, I’m just saying I have the patience of a saint.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a kung fu master, I’m just saying I have the dexterity of a contortionist.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a wrestler, I’m just saying I have the endurance of a camel.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a boxer, I’m just saying I have the timing of a Swiss watch.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a karate master, I’m just saying I have the discipline of a soldier.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m a kung fu master, I’m just saying I have the precision of a surgeon

Quotes About Beating Someone Up. QuotesGram from quotesgram.com