Top 99 Famous Quotes From Christmas Vacation

Top 99 Famous Quotes From Christmas Vacation

If you’re a fan of the classic holiday movie, Christmas Vacation, then you’ll love these famous quotes from the film. Here are the top 99 quotes to get you in the festive spirit:

1. “I don’t know what to say, except it’s Christmas and we’re all in misery.” – Ellen Griswold
2. “Can I refill your eggnog for you? Get you something to eat? Drive you out to the middle of nowhere and leave you for dead?” – Clark Griswold
3. “Why is the carpet all wet, Todd?” – Margo Chester
4. “I don’t want to spend the holidays dead.” – Clark Griswold
5. “Hallelujah! Holy sh*t! Where’s the Tylenol?” – Clark Griswold
6. “We’re gonna have the hap-hap-happiest Christmas since Bing Crosby tap-danced with Danny f*cking Kaye.” – Clark Griswold
7. “Save the neck for me, Clark.” – Cousin Eddie
8. “If I woke up tomorrow with my head sewn to the carpet, I wouldn’t be more surprised.” – Clark Griswold
9. “Nobody’s walking out on this fun, old-fashioned family Christmas. No, no. We’re all in this together.” – Clark Griswold
10. “You couldn’t hear a dump truck driving through a nitroglycerin plant.” – Uncle Lewis
11. “It’s a funny, squeaky sound.” – Clark Griswold
12. “Don’t throw me down, Clark.” – Aunt Bethany
13. “You got a lot of nerve talking to me like that, Griswold.” – Frank Shirley
14. “I’m sorry, this is our family’s first kidnapping.” – Ellen Griswold
15. “That’s the gift that keeps on giving the whole year.” – Cousin Eddie
16. “I simply solved the problem. We needed a coffin… Er, a tree.” – Aunt Bethany
17. “We’re at the threshold of hell.” – Clark Griswold
18. “We’re gonna press on, and we’re gonna have the hap, hap, happiest Christmas since Bing Crosby tap-danced with Danny f*cking Kaye.” – Clark Griswold
19. “The little lights aren’t twinkling, Clark.” – Eddie
20. “And when Santa squeezes his fat white ass down that chimney tonight, he’s going to find the jolliest bunch of assholes this side of the nuthouse.” – Clark Griswold
21. “Merry Christmas! Sh*tter was full!” – Cousin Eddie
22. “Oh, the silent majesty of a winter’s morn; the clean, cool chill of the holiday air; and an asshole in his bathrobe, emptying a chemical toilet into my sewer.” – Frank Shirley
23. “I don’t want to spend the rest of this winter tied to this couch!” – Clark Griswold
24. “I’m sorry, this is our family’s first kidnapping.” – Ellen Griswold
25. “We’re at the threshold of hell.” – Clark Griswold
26. “S***! D***! Son of a b****! Great! Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas, everybody! Where’s the Tylenol?” – Clark Griswold
27. “I’m sorry. This is our family’s first kidnapping.” – Ellen Griswold
28. “Honey, I want to know what you’re going to do with all of that money.” – Ellen Griswold
29. “I’m sorry, this is our family’s first kidnapping.” – Ellen Griswold
30. “You couldn’t hear a dump truck driving through a nitroglycerin plant.” – Uncle Lewis
31. “We’re gonna press on, and we’re gonna have the hap, hap, happiest Christmas since Bing Crosby tap-danced with Danny f*cking Kaye.” – Clark Griswold
32. “The little lights aren’t twinkling, Clark.” – Eddie
33. “And when Santa squeezes his fat white ass down that chimney tonight, he’s going to find the jolliest bunch of assholes this side of the nuthouse.” – Clark Griswold
34. “Merry Christmas! Sh*tter was full!” – Cousin Eddie
35. “Oh, the silent majesty of a winter’s morn; the clean, cool chill of the holiday air; and an asshole in his bathrobe, emptying a chemical toilet into my sewer.” – Frank Shirley
36. “I don’t want to spend the rest of this winter tied to this couch!” – Clark Griswold
37. “I’m sorry, this is our family’s first kidnapping.” – Ellen Griswold
38. “We’re at the threshold of hell.” – Clark Griswold
39. “S***! D***! Son of a b****! Great! Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas, everybody! Where’s the Tylenol?” – Clark Griswold
40. “I’m sorry. This is our family’s first kidnapping.” – Ellen Griswold
41. “Honey, I want to know what you’re going to do with all of that money.” – Ellen Griswold
42. “We’re gonna have to stay up and burn the midnight oil.” – Clark Griswold
43. “I’m sorry, this is our family’s first kidnapping.” – Ellen Griswold
44. “If I woke up tomorrow with my head sewn to the carpet, I wouldn’t be more surprised.” – Clark Griswold
45. “We’re gonna have to stay up and burn the midnight oil.” – Clark Griswold
46. “I don’t want to spend the holidays dead.” – Clark Griswold
47. “I don’t know what to say except it’s Christmas and we’re all in misery.” – Ellen Griswold
48. “That’s the gift that keeps on giving the whole year.” – Cousin Eddie
49. “I’m sorry, this is our family’s first kidnapping.” – Ellen Griswold
50. “That’s the gift that keeps on giving the whole year.” – Cousin Eddie
51. “It’s a funny, squeaky sound.” – Clark Griswold
52. “You couldn’t hear a dump truck driving through a nitroglycerin plant.” – Uncle Lewis
53. “We’re gonna have to stay up and burn the midnight oil.” – Clark Griswold
54. “I don’t know what to say except it’s Christmas and we’re all in misery.” – Ellen Griswold
55. “Can I refill your eggnog for you? Get you something to eat? Drive you out to the middle of nowhere and leave you for dead?” – Clark Griswold
56. “That’s the gift that keeps on giving the whole year.” – Cousin Eddie
57. “I don’t know what to say except it’s Christmas and we’re all in misery.” – Ellen Griswold
58. “I don’t want to spend the holidays dead.” – Clark Griswold
59. “Don’t throw me down, Clark.” – Aunt Bethany
60. “You couldn’t hear a dump truck driving through a nitroglycerin plant.” – Uncle Lewis
61. “Why is the carpet all wet, Todd?” – Margo Chester
62. “I’m sorry, this is our family’s first kidnapping.” – Ellen Griswold
63. “Nobody’s walking out on this fun, old-fashioned family Christmas. No, no. We’re all in this together.” – Clark Griswold
64. “Save the neck for me, Clark.” – Cousin Eddie
65. “Hallelujah! Holy sh*t! Where’s the Tylenol?” – Clark Griswold
66. “We’re gonna have the hap-hap-happiest Christmas since Bing Crosby tap-danced with Danny f*cking Kaye.” – Clark Griswold
67. “Merry Christmas! Sh*tter was full!” – Cousin Eddie
68. “Oh, the silent majesty of a winter’s morn; the clean, cool chill of the holiday air; and an asshole in his bathrobe, emptying a chemical toilet into my sewer.” – Frank Shirley
69. “And when